My Blog
Uncover the latent talent in yourself
16th May 2022 1 min read
220 written stories I have reached
A barrier I thought I could not breach
Looking back, it took patience and grit
As well as faith and self-belief indeed.
The first step was my stumbling block
Almost impossible, I recalled
I would retreat for a while
Or I might press on
Never, never, never give up
Seek, Strive, and soldier on
The results will finally show
Try harder and words would certainly flow.
May 8th 2022 1 min read
It was a beautiful day
As I drove up the alleyway
A man with two kids and a mutt at the roadside
Intended to cross to the other side
He suddenly reined them in, startled and stunned
I was equally stumped
By what he thought was my haste
But the car was at a steady pace
Then he shot daggers in my direction
As if I had evil intention
Baffled and bewildered I was
As I looked through the rearview mirror
He still stared in a murderous manner
Hey, relax!
Don’t overreact!
You have imagined your fear
The path was totally clear
In Singapore, Life is hectic
Don’t let it make you erratic
Stay calm and composed
Events will always come, I suppose
Take it within your stride
Not another day to be decried.
And the factor to overcome it….
1st May 2022 3 min read
I am aware of the power of the mind, the passion and the persistence.
Living in today’s world, we see how incredibly intelligent human beings can be through their achievements, their imagination and their determination. It is the rare few who will break through the common mold and leave their marks in this world and for the good of human mankind.
From the development of medicine which reduces suffering and prolong life to walking on the moon to connecting the world through the internet, to the partnering with AI that will improve human performance and efficiency, we know the mind is limitless in what it wants to achieve.
Each of us have goals and fears. What’s holding us back? I list them as lack of courage, practice, imagination and practice. So here I am with my list of goals, some left on the backburner because of the aforementioned factors. As an average human being, I do not have lofty goals but mine to overcome and feel the triumph.
It used to be public speaking. As they say, for some people, they rather be in the wooden box then to eulogize at a wake. Think of the missed opportunities when one do not learn to articulate well. Misunderstandings result, being seen as a ‘no brainer’ in the true sense of the phrase, and a cold fish, perhaps.
Most successful people are good in communication skills. It is an art and a science, one that can be mastered, by learning about the steps, putting it into practice and believing yourself. If one wants to be successful and move the people around you into action, it is the best and first thing to learn.
It is never too late. We need to talk to somebody every day and we want it to be effective!
As I write this as a Toastmaster of 35 years, I begin to uncover the impediment to my slow progress — The unwillingness to overcome my fear.
The dislike of listening to my own voice, the uncomfortable feeling of watching my video, and the associated embarrassment of not being able to carry through. It is a struggle that I put up at each meeting, wondering if I would forget my lines and always holding on to my crutch which is my script and worrying how I look, lol.
Meanwhile, those members who wanted to tape themselves and scrutinize any errors they have vowed to correct, are improving by leaps and bounds. They have progressed to represent the club at Speech Contests and these platforms will bring them to new levels of communication skill.
Writing this article makes me realize that I need courage. Not to be afraid to fail and try again. Not to bothered by any embarrassment. Maybe I discover I could ad-lip when I get stuck! Not to strive for perfection. True effort is good enough.
The next meeting, I shall try. I just discovered how to open up my power point on zoom so the road to doing more projects have been paved by my asking others how to use power point on zoom. It is a small step in the right direction.
Now, I need to believe in myself.
“Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside of you that is greater than any obstacle.” — -Christian D Larson
It is within you…..
30th April 2022 4 min read
No, it is not supplements. Neither is it lots of sleep, nutritious food, plenty of exercises, yoga, meditation, etc.
These measures certainly do help. But the single most important factor, in my opinion anyway, is first of all, your temperament. How do you react to the everyday stresses of living?
Does it get you anxious easily? Do you flare up at the slightest thing that went wrong? Do you go into a tirade against others without considering the circumstances, reasons, or causes?
What happens when the body gets stressed?
The hypothalamus, the control tower in our brain will send out stress hormones to help us deal with the ‘threat’ at hand. It triggers the fight or flight syndrome that is supposed to protect us and allows a quick reaction.
The hypothalamus demands that the adrenal glands release stress hormones, adrenaline, and cortisol to help you cope.
As a result, your heart beat faster, your breathing rate increases, and your muscles tighten to ready for action. In the short term, it allows you to have a sharp response and may save your life. For example, when pursued by somebody, you may be surprised that this fight or flight response will see you counter your opponent with more might than you expected or even run faster than you thought you could.
When the threat is over, the systems go back to normal.
However, in the long term, if the stress response keeps firing, in other words, you allow yourself to be triggered by every little event, you will put your health at great risk. The result is chronic stress which impacts your body by affecting many systems;
1 Lung — -Continuous rapid breathing during stress sends more oxygen-rich blood to your body. This makes you short of breath. It will worsen your breathing if you already have asthma or emphysema ( lung disease)
2 Heart — -Heartbeat rises to send more blood to the muscles to strengthen them for action. In the process, the blood vessels constrict raising blood pressure. Chronic stress then results in a possible stroke or heart attack.
3 Digestion — Under stress, the liver produces more blood sugar or glucose to boost your energy. When chronically stressed, the body cannot cope with the extra blood sugar, resulting in type 2 diabetes.
Stress affects the movement of food through the body resulting in diarrhea or constipation.
You may experience vomiting or get heartburn due to acid reflux caused by an increase in stomach acid.
4 Muscles — -Constant tense muscles may result in headaches, shoulder, back, and body aches, and make you less inclined to exercise resulting in a vicious cycle.
5 Reproductive system —In females, the menstrual cycle may be disrupted and menopausal symptoms magnified. In males, constant stress can affect testosterone levels and may interfere with sperm production, and even result in erectile dysfunction.
6 Immunity — Chronic stress can weaken a person’s immunity making him more susceptible to viral infections such as flu and common colds as well as bacterial infections.
Knowing the myriad effects on the body systems, one has to take steps to get to the root cause which triggered this fight or flight response.
How do we not let a situation or event become chronically stressful and nib it in the bud?
Aside from the above steps recommended above to combat stress that has been triggered, the first line of defense is in our approach to the problem itself.
How does one put out the fire? The wrath, the doubts, and the insecurities caused by the person or the incident. Our negative emotional response is the most damaging factor that triggered the stress reaction and if not tempered would become a chronic stress instigator.
Solutions
1 Staying calm is the first order.
Start by breathing steadily. Staying positive and actively seeking solutions are next. With good temperance, the cloud hovering over your thoughts would clear. There is a solution to most problems.
If there aren’t any solutions, there is no point in getting all frazzled. At least you look cool.
2 Suppress all negative images and likely scenarios as they may not happen, not when you take proactive steps to alleviate the situation.
3 Seek out the resources that may help; people with the ability, the interest to help, and the knowledge. There may be people with similar experiences.
4 Ask yourself what is the worst that can happen. Accept it but take steps to alleviate it. Putting emotions before rationale will result in knee-jerk responses that may be harmful.
Flying off the handle, abusing others or self, and engaging in self-pity are all unproductive responses. Most people would stay away from such outbursts.
5 Be honest. If it is clearly your fault, admit it or it may escalate into a dispute where evidence would be held against you. If it is not your fault, you are in the position to put the situation under your control anyway without undue stress.
6 Look for the good. Every event is like a coin with two sides. While something bad has happened, something good would result from it. One must have a good perspective. Eventually, all incidents pass and becomes water under the bridge.
Conclusion
Every day will bring different forms of challenges and strains. I practise what I believe and can only say that the ability to put out the ‘fire’ before it even ignite is an effective way to develop inner peace.
April 25th 2022 1 min read
It has power
It heals
It hurts
It destroys
It maims
It soothes
It enlightens
It inspires
It is the words we use, the phrases we utter
Use them wisely
They rarely can be retracted or forgotten easily
Three words may lessen the hurt
They are “I am sorry”
Three words may give you hope
They are “Everything is OK”
Three words may give you happiness
They are “I love you”
April 25th 2022 1 min read
Rosalind Ho at PPP Coffee
What does one do when caught in a web of conflict?
Usually, it’s all a misunderstanding
It is best to have an open discussion
Who is hurt by what is said
Turns out to be unintentional comments but with a purpose
Not to hurt but to heal
But misconstrued otherwise
Step back, take a breather, review the comments
Humans are sensitive, sentient and sensible beings
Rationalize, respond and retreat
Let time moderate the situation
Everything becomes good.