Be mindful……..they do work!
Summer Lotus Aug 10 · 5 min read
We all want a nice working environment with pleasant colleagues who are helpful, efficient, and understanding. But in the world of constant flux, this nice scenario does not last. That is left to yourself to change and adapt to the new setting. As they say, change what you can control.
It is often related to a person’s character flaws and traits. Being aware of them would go a long way to achieving peace and harmony in the workplace.
1 Control your emotions— This is probably the most destructive of all emotions. Being impulsive and prone to anger. Anger only muddles your mind and provokes others. There is no incident that cannot be alleviated when one cool down, assess, and analyze.
It may be the other party who blows his or her top. Let no one anger you.
Personal outbursts may be that, personal. They could be having a bad start in the day. But some people carry this around like an albatross around their necks and hurt themselves and their relationships. They carry their crummy mood to work and offload on others like the proverbial man who goes home to kick his dog after a stressful day.
So lock up your problems when you leave home and not carry your mood to your office and vice versa.
2 Expect to be bullied until you prove yourself.
Life is such. It is a discriminatory world. You will be discriminated whether you are young or old, rich or poor, tall or short, good looking or not, white or colored, etc. There will be people who will not have anything good to say but then the onus is on you to ignore. Prove it in what matters — -your work.
The only way is to be hard-working, amicable, and humble. Know your work well and nothing can be held against you. Be friendly and approachable. Be teachable and seek out those who love to mentor others.
Only when you excel in your arena, will there be a legion of fans. People like winners and when you share, everyone wins. There should be no bitterness.
3. Have the right mindset —The wrong mindset can impede your progress as a boss or employee;
Eg 1of a wrong mindset is a fixed mindset thinking that only you have all the solutions because of your age or training or exposure. That is certainly an archaic approach. A fixed mindset would leave others thinking you are inflexible and difficult to deal with. More so, in today’s informative world, the options are abundant and not everyone may know so many. Be open to fresh ideas.
Ever since I engaged two young students as my part-time dental assistants, I am greatly enlightened. By their suggestions and ideas. I know where their strengths lie. They could rectify hiccups very fast, anything that is related to computers for example. They are fast and eager to learn if engaged in an interesting manner.
Eg 2 of a wrong mindset is a performance mindset, thinking only about bottom-line. This can result in short-cuts when delivering your product or services. I prefer a contemplative mindset where one is not just focused on the goal but the process. A contemplative mindset considers the journey rather than the destination ensuring that it is smooth and provides learning at the same time. It is for the long haul. Considerations such as:
Is everyone enjoying what they are doing?
If not, how to make it more enjoyable?
Is there a smarter and shorter way to achieve work done?
There should be a cause for celebration when work is well done and the mission is accomplished. Colleagues should be commended, encouraged to strive harder, and share success stories with others. The ultimate good is for the company which will benefit everyone in return.
Even when one is short of the target, if you can get this far, you will surely reach it another time.
4 Be patient—A lot of unhappiness results from expectations, not met. Slow down, Boss, or colleague. Some people take time to prove themselves. maybe your instructions are not clear
Understand human behavior and what motivates it. — Most thrive on praise. Catch others doing the right things. Praise opens doors and it is a good chance to get in on some recommendations for improvement just like evaluating a speech. There are bound to be some flaws that should be highlighted.
Lazy ones need a kick in the butt but given a second chance. The chronic, irredeemable ones should be given the boot. When they go somewhere else, Society will know how to teach them to pull up their bootstraps.
With my young assistants, I tried not to raise any mistakes in front of others. Gentle strokes for all folks. When it is a big mistake, it is also gently mentioned. I work on the premise that people are sincerely there to please others and themselves and they will try if LAziness is not genetically engraved in their bones. I believe you giving others time to adjust to their new roles.
Time and patience are the greatest virtues
Now, they have proven to be steady and dependable.
5 Have an Exemplary behavior —Whether as a boss or a colleague, if you do not want any unhappiness working with others, fulfill your promise if you have made any. Have a good reason if you did not. Be punctual, orderly, and smile. The latter is the most disarming weapon you can have.
6 Overcome human obstacles — Despite all that you have set a good example, you still can’t stop the idle gossip. Instead of feeling upset about that, it is more profitable to spend time improving on the knowledge or skill that you have put on a back burner. Discussing someone else’s shortcomings when it has no bearing on your work is an utter waste of time. Especially if that someone is not receptive to any recommendation or help.
I often overheard in the lift about people talking about their colleagues’ performance. If you know you are doing your best, be immune to gossips as you can’t stop other mouths. If you find out what your shortcomings are, work on them and the gossips would stop. It is so simple.
A wise man once said, ‘Do not ask what is a good man. Be one’.
7 Listen, then ask to be listened out
Most conflicts persist because people try to get on top of each other to defend themselves. If one is drawn into a dispute, hear out the other person totally first. Then ask for your turn to speak.
Toastmasters have prepared us to speak off the cuff and in an organized manner. Moreover, we also cover the art of persuasion in many projects. Be amazed at how you can turn the discussion in your favor.
If you are wrong, admit that it is your fault with an apology and assurance that it will not repeat.
Human interaction is complex because we are complex beings. The office can be a wonderful place for networking, building long term relationships, learning, and achieving one’s goals. It is a place of fulfillment and happiness if people can be more aware and cultivate soft skills and not just result-driven.
A peaceful and harmonious environment allows goals to be easily attained.
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