To learn fast depends on your own desire to find out more and on successful interaction with others.
To learn fast depends on your own desire to find out more and on successful interaction with others.
In my late fifties, I started to travel solo to the anguish of my family members. They did not see why I would take risk. In fact, most of them would limit their travels. With the ongoing bad news around the world, there was no affinity for travel and venture outside his or her comfort zone.
I saw it differently. I wanted to see for myself what it was like to be all alone in a foreign country meeting people some of whom might become my friends or just acquaintances for that encounter. I wanted to find out if I could survive on my own if nobody was willing to talk to me or help me.
I did that on one of my scuba diving adventures in 2014. I signed up for what I felt was a reputable dive cruise company organizing 7 days of scuba diving in the paradise destination of the Maldives. On arrival at male airport, I was received by the cruise leader and the first thing he did was point to my birth date on his guests list — yes, I nodded, DOB is 1958 and I was the right guest on their dive team. He seemed unbelievable that a mature Chinese lady would come alone to join their team.
Once on the dive cruise boat, I met others, all of them younger than myself. It was not without some obstacles or so they seemed to me anyway. Nobody wanted to buddy an older person presumably due to poorer or slower motor skills. After the orientation dives, where they could judge our scuba skills, I was given the choice to buddy with a dive photographer. Now, if you are an underwater photographer, you must be a very good scuba diver to be able to carry that heavy equipment , beat the currents sometimes and maintain steady buoyancy to shoot good pictures. So, I knew I had scored quite well for their ‘test’.
I chose to buddy with the guide instead as I did not want to be waiting for my buddy while he took pictures. Moreover, with the guide, I would have the privilege of seeing marine life firsthand when he pointed any findings to the dive team.
As I have always believed, if you want to be good at something, then who you surround yourself with is important. I asked questions. I faltered initially in some dives such as in descending as it was generally not smooth and quick descent for me. I quickly found out from my guide that I had remaining pockets of air in my buoyancy jacket which I could release faster by pulling the tab and also keeping my body straight on descent and not just by letting air out with my body inclined forward. Error corrected and I never had a slow descent again.
Generally, my air tank consumption was good but from my guide, I learned the art of properly breathing to maximize air use. A long drawing in of the breath and then slow expiration goes a long way to keeping my air tank always adequate. I watched how he was so relaxed in the water, the strokes of his fins, precise and sure that I improved mine many times more. My air gauge rarely goes into the ‘red zone’ which would signal ‘time to ascend’ and ‘preparation to end the dive’.
On dive cruises unlike resort dives, every piece of equipment is the diver’s responsibility. We checked our own depth computers, air tanks, buoyancy jackets, masks, fins, etc. Nothing was left to chance. That was very good training for personal responsibility and discipline. Buddy system makes one watch out for your partner too. One difference from a resort dive is that the dive cruises ventured further to more remote and beautiful corners of the dive destination as the dive cruises are ‘moving hotels’, covering more exotic dive sites and returning to base at the end of the trip.
Scuba diving (sports in fact) built self esteem, self confidence and calmness. To be able to enjoy the sport, we need to be properly accredited. In any contingency, I have learned to be calm and collected so that I could figure out what to do next.
At one dive, my spare regulator leaked air profusely causing a brief panic. As my buddy had swam ahead , she was not aware of my predicament. I calmed myself and gently tapped on the regulator which eventually stopped leaking. Apparently, it was stuck. Then I caught up with my guide to explain with hand signals what happened and he saw to me that everything was in order before I joined my buddy again. Yes, buddy may stray away sometimes. Dependence on oneself is paramount even in a partnering system in scuba diving.
Learning could only be possible because I had made a solo travel and chose a skillful guide who was generous with his knowledge. Had I traveled with another friend, we would probably be buddy to each other and not learned anything new.
Travelling on my own had helped me to push my social boundaries. Being an introvert and not naturally smiley in my disposition, I made it a point to reach out to others and showed interest in being their friends. In the process, I discovered people who are more disinclined to social interaction other than with marine life. But I was not disheartened. It was nothing personal, some people were just not into making friends and were into scuba diving to escape from the harsh realities of the working world.
The friends that I did make, I learnt much from them. Some were good at underwater photography, some were good at computer software skills. I acquired knowledge about things like drop box, adobe, even settings of the of a DSLR camera for underwater photography that prove to be very useful for my travels.
The different personalities with their corresponding cultures enthralled me. The Chinese Nationals were generally a boisterous lot, definitely more outspoken than my countrymen of whom I was the only one. The Italians I met were also quite expressive but the Norwegians and French seemed reticent. Germans were more cliquish it seemed. It may be the language barrier.
From other dive cruises, I have mingled with Korean divers who had a great underwater photographer for their own guide. One of the lady divers who was in her fifties inspired me. She was an avid traveler, continued to ski and scuba dive even though she was quite badly hurt in one knee. From her, I came to know of a very mobile knee brace that she installed around her knee. This contraption kept the knee in position without letting it be dislocated again. Kudos to her for her ‘never die’ spirit as she continued to enjoy her sports.
On one trip, I was the only Asian in the whole team of about 16 guests. A very funny incident happened. During the dives, most of them were wearing wet suits. As I have dived in the Maldives several times and comes from sunny Singapore, I find the temperature of the waters in the Indian Ocean very agreeable to my body unlike the chilly waters of Australia or even some parts of Bali.
So, when some of the foreigners (Italians, Norwegians, Germans, Swedes, British)noticed that I was only wearing a lycra top and gym tights for scuba diving, they were curious. On the next dives, most of the men shed their wet suits, choosing to use T shirts and some even bared their bodies before donning their dive equipments. They finally got comfortable in their own skin, so to speak and realized the fear of cold was in their own heads.
For an introspective person like myself, I have come a long way to break the ice with strangers. During breaks in between dives, I took the initiative to introduce myself and my country. I had a session with the Swedes and a British where I drew mandarin characters and explained how the Mandarin kanji words came about and the meanings behind them. It was an interesting interaction for us. From these trips, I made a friend from Germany and she subsequently invited me to be her dive buddy for our next trip to Palau.
I am glad for these deviations in my life paths. It takes courage to go solo and look out for yourself. But I find that it is really up to one to reach out to others to establish a friendship. The world is not as cold as it seems to be sometimes.
Travelling solo piqued my senses. I have become more alert to the surroundings and this is good for my personal development in areas of self awareness, mindfulness and self confidence. You would be surprised how a sedentary person when exposed to a new environment would be awakened from his comfort zone to discover that he has more mettle than he thinks especially if he gets into trouble.
Notwithstanding all the opportunities that you are given in life to travel as you wish, it is important that one must put in effort to ensure safety first. This involves knowing what you are doing, being prepared in the case of contingencies, self responsibilities, self care and not being naive to situations. Establishing good rapport with people always help.
The world becomes increasingly exciting when one is more open to others. Being genuinely interested in other people, making friends, gaining knowledge earnestly to better ourselves and sharing with others is what makes any trip worthwhile.
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