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Thanks to my renewed interest in reading.

Recently, I developed a penchant for Mandarin.

I grew up in an environment where half of my siblings were schooled in Mandarin. My dad hailed from China in the 1920s as a young immigrant. He was a teacher and I used to be intrigued by his Mandarin accent.

When I was young, I sat in his class sometimes as a kid while he taught in the now-defunct Mandarin Hakka clan school but the language never did catch my fancy.

Until I reach this retiring age.

As I delve into reading about some Chinese idioms and common phrases, I started to fall in love with the metaphors of these expressions of which I am elaborating only three.

They became very meaningful to me and I often applied them in my daily living.

1 我们要雪中送炭不要雪上加霜。

Translated, this beautiful metaphor means we should try to bring charcoal to the snow and not add frost to the snow.

It sounds quite weird in English but the meaning is as follows ;

雪中送炭 – Bringing charcoal to the snow. In this scenario, the charcoal is brought to warm the snow and hence relieves the coldness.

In a difficult situation, it is to do something to alleviate somebody’s pain or discomfort.

For instance, if someone is in trouble and asks you for help, would you ignore or see if you can help? In my case, I will assess if it is within my capacity to assist. If not I could refer to someone who has the knowledge, resources, and willingness to help. By turning away, you are allowing the person to ‘freeze in the snow’, so to speak. Helping him is likened to bringing charcoal to his freezing state.

It would be most distressing to the person to launch into a lecture or a tirade against what he or she has or has not done. Because he has come to sought help in the first place.

If you bring charcoal to the snow ie you help in some way, you will see the relief, the smile, and the peace when the affected person is given hope and you feel happy and fulfilled in return.

In other words, do not bring frost to the snow 雪上加霜. This is putting frost on the snow, making it colder.

This is by nagging and scolding the person who is already distraught when he seeks help from you ie you are kicking a person who is already down.

In short, bring solutions and not add to the problems. I tried to apply this principle every day and found my peace of mind that I do not aggravate others. Even leaving a few words of kindness and encouragement is also a form of charcoal.

2 不要一口吃胖子 – Literal meaning is that ‘ Do not eat a fat person in one mouthful ‘

Again, it sounds awkward but this is one principle that already exists in the English lexicon. The English equivalent is “Do not bite off more than you can chew”.

However, I like the ‘fat person’ metaphor in Mandarin because it is more graphic and hence it sticks with me. It is my constant reminder to seek balance and not to overdo things.

For example, if I am overwhelmed by work, I would begin to space out my appointments so that the fewer patients have my undivided attention and the job gets done well even if it means less income.

My goal is to achieve 100% satisfaction in solving patients’ complaints.

Cramping a whole list of goals in a day is likened to eating up a fat person.

A classic eg; You want to hit 10,000 steps every day, have your diary of appointments back to back, close as many deals as possible and finish all your assignments by the end of the day and expect a full commitment for your family.

This puts a huge strain and stress on yourself and all the steps taken may be mediocre as there is a time crunch. Something or most of it will buckle. Maybe your sanity.

Spending excessively without saving at all is also a similar scenario. Landing yourself in a dire financial situation due to overspending is the result. Overeating is also like eating a fat person except you look like one.

The third Mandarin phrase of interest to me is 冰冻三尺非一日之寒。

Translated, it means three feet of ice does not form in a day. This idiom in English is known popularly as “ Rome was not built in a day”

This is another principle which I need to drum into my head every day.

Naturally impatient, I expected success but what I get is mediocrity sometimes either due to poor timing or due to being in a rush.

Everything takes time. Haste makes waste, it’s been proven.

To do a job or anything well, there are no shortcuts. We need to take action, understanding the basics, the structure, the intricacies of what makes anything tick.

Watch an apprentice work then compare his work to his master. The master has honed his skills for ages, probably made many mistakes, and corrected his ways until he arrives at the ultimate skill to produce his craft. He has reached the pink of perfection.

By the same token, when observing how someone is skillful at his job or anything else, we must remember that he must be an industrious, patient, and persistent person. The good news is that we all can become what we want to become given time and the tenacity to pursue our goals.

These three common expressions sound innocuous but they have helped me smoothen out my ice journey. Every time that I am caught in a sticky situation, I asked myself “Am I bringing charcoal to the snow or adding frost to the snow”? Am I eating a ‘fat man’. Do I know that “three feet of ice does not form in one day”?

By abiding by these are simple principles, I have largely stayed on course in my relationship with others, maintain balance in my life and stay calm in my pursuits.

Summer Lotus Sep 5 6 min read

Some steps that we may have overlooked in busy Singapore

Singapore is one of the most expensive cities to live in. However, the advantages of living in Singapore are many and it remains one of the most coveted cities in the world despite the high living costs.

In this era of global warming and climate change, it behooves everyone to do their part to conserve resources starting from the home. These habits should be adopted and will make a significant change in your bottom line.

To ameliorate these high-cost factors, one could exercise some effort to cut corners so to speak but legally of course. It requires us to be mindful of our way of living.

Here are a few suggestions (by no means exhaustive);

1 Water Usage —

Water is not cheap. In Singapore, water is not only imported and they incur costs to be purified. There are also treatment costs to produce water from our local catchment areas and unconventional sources, specifically Newater and desalinated water. In addition, there are storage and distribution costs to the population and the factories.

Considering the fact that Singapore cannot be reliant on the neighboring countries to supply water, it is our national duty to ‘save’ ourselves in times of urgency. Here are some ways, common but often overlooked.

1) Do not wash dishes under running water. At best, it could be a steady stream and the dishes could be soaked in a bigger container.

2) Wipe food off plates before soaping all dishes. It is cleaner hence is easier and faster to wash.

3) Oily pots and pans should be presoaked with soap water to make them easier to wash.

4) If you have a garden, collect rainwater which you can use to wash the backyard and toilet floors. Water can also be used for watering indoor plants and washing cars.

However, collected water should be utilized within two days to avoid breeding mosquitoes.

5) Use a cup when brushing teeth and a basin for washing your face which also collects water.

2 Electricity Usage

1) Use air-con only on very unbearably hot days. It should be set at 25 to 27 degrees in summer to ensure maximum energy efficiency. Switch to fans as far as possible. Also, set the timer on air-cons to be more precise.

2) Switch off all appliances when not in use.

3) Use LED (light-emitting diode) lights which save up to 90% compared to the traditional bulbs when using the same light output. Reasons:

a) LED panel lighting is highly energy-efficient and can save around 90% electricity as compared to incandescent lights and 50% as compared to CFLs(Compact Fluorescent lamps)

b) Reduce “light pollution” as the LED light is highly focused and so there is less scattered light in the environment.

c) LED lights do emit negligible heat to the environment because of their high efficiency to convert electricity to light. Consequently, they are good for plant growth as they do not add heat to the environment like conventional bulbs.

d)There is less emission of greenhouse gases.

e)They also do not contain some mercury like CFLs. CFLs contain about 4 mg of mercury which may be released if the latter is broken.

f) LED lights may last between 35,000 and 50,000 hours. This means that it would take a long time before the next replacement. It degrades and dims over time and is very safe.

4) Solar light is free energy and worth exploring. If they are charged adequately in direct sunlight, they will automatically function after dusk. They are dependent on weather conditions so may not be so bright after a cloudy or rainy day due to inadequate charging.

They are simple to install as they could be left out in the sun to charge but rechargeable batteries are used. Generally, the lights are less powerful but they provide great ambiance lights for the garden and walkway. They do not last as long as LED lights and need to be cleaned so that sunlight can be absorbed.

3 Cutting expenses on a daily basis

1 Choosing water as the beverage over cafe’s coffee and tea. Water is healthy and cheap. It is not only a very good habit to hydrate yourself, but it also makes your occasional trip to the cafe a rare and enjoyable one. Assuming that it cost $1 a bottle and you are bottling from home, that would be a saving of $350 a year.

2 Search for good buys on the internet using mobile apps. Whether it is goods or services, the internet offers innumerable websites where you can shop for things economically. Many enterprises have a presence on the internet as mobile apps which may be downloaded and you can find great deals ranging from clothes to food to services, etc.

The Fave mobile app has fave deals and fave pay. Fave deals offer discounted prices of items from many categories. These are pre-paid purchases that customers can redeem online or at physical stores.

Fave pay allows you to pay quickly at participating stores by scanning the store’s QR code with your smartphone and receive instant cashback. At the same time, you may earn partner cashback as much as 20% which is applied automatically on your next purchase at the same partner outlet. It does have an expiry date.

Grab App has many options that range from affordable travel rides to having your food delivered to your doorstep, saving time, petrol, and parking. You may also have a whole host of household necessities delivered to your home without hassle. Each Grabpay transaction will earn you more Grabreward points which can be used to redeem more goodies.

In Singapore (and several Asian countries), Carousell App is a marvelous platform that enables a user to sell underutilized or unused stuff that can generate some cash for customers. You may also come across good bargains from other sellers. It is really a win-win situation for buyers and sellers and helps save money.

4 Use your Credit cards wisely.

Knowing your budget and spending within your means enables you to save money.

Credit cards are a great convenience when it comes to payment. You can pay online, not carry a wad of dollars in your wallet and earn reward points. Many cards give cashback on purchase and some convert your spending into miles for your travel purposes.

All this is to your benefit if you spend within your means and pay off the outstanding balance by the due date. Otherwise, the amount one owes can become a runaway train. This snowball effect can lead to poor credit scores.

As a clear example, we have a bank’s credit card whose interest rate is 25% a year (many banks have increased their rates).

Assuming, your credit card bill is $5000 and the minimum sum is $50 a month.

You have decided to only pay the minimum sum of $50. Any unpaid balance and interest continue to be charged. At this rate, you would take 14.5 years to pay off and the total amount would be $13,500 or 3 X the original debt!

If you don’t pay the minimum sum by the due date, there will be a late fee and finance charge added to your next bill that attracts interest.

In addition, be aware that a credit card has an annual fee subscription(though the first year is free) and this is added to your bill. It may be reversed out if you contact your bank. Replacement cards also may be charged and any advance withdrawal of cash also attracts fees.

In short, credit cards are for short-term payments and not long-term loans. Being mindful of how a credit card works can help one to tap on its conveniences and benefits without getting into financial trouble.

5 Remortgage your housing loan

Unless you are flushed with cash, most people in Singaporeans are on a housing loan as the cost of housing is exorbitant by any world standard. It is not uncommon as we are busy with our daily lives, that payments are drawn from our accounts to pay off the loan without us realizing that we could pay the loan at a cheaper, prevailing rate.

Refinancing your house saves money as you may get a lower interest rate or reduce the loan term without changing the amount much. The best person to speak with is your bank officer.

6 Take care of your health

Health is Wealth as they say. Though you may be covered by insurance that protects you from the inevitable, taking care of your health in all the ways that we already know goes a long way to save costs.

In conclusion, it is about living smart with your money. This list is by no means exhaustive but they are practical everyday activities that we could perform to reduce unnecessary high bills. Living in Singapore may be expensive but not exercising caution in the way we live our lives can make it expensive anywhere we stay in the world.

Understanding the implications of missing teeth.

Teeth are lost due to many reasons such as gross decay, trauma, fracture, gum disease, etc. Some patients may not be aware of the long-term dire effects of losing teeth and how it could lead to more dental problems and further tooth loss.

Effects of missing teeth

1. Losing front teeth can affect speech, esthetics and mastication in particular when incising food. This may impact the person’s self-confidence and self-esteem.
2. Losing back teeth can result in masticatory functions. The more teeth are lost, the more stress would be transferred to existing dentition causing stress fractures and broken fillings.
3. Patients may make several dietary changes, such as avoiding tougher meats and certain food. In the long term, this will affect the type and amount of nutrients that they receive from their meals.
4. Over time, if the missing teeth are not replaced, physiological movement of the neighboring teeth will result in tilting of these teeth into the space. This makes it harder to replace the gap in the future. In addition, teeth that are tilted are harder to clean and have an increased risk of getting decay and gum disease.
5. Without a corresponding tooth to bite on, the opposing tooth may over erupt. This poses a problem as the tooth will grow into the space of the missing tooth, making future replacement of the missing tooth difficult and more costly.
6. When a tooth is lost, bone will resorb. It would require a bone graft before an implant can be inserted. In some cases, the ridges become knife-edged and cannot tolerate eating during eating especially when wearing dentures.

Options to replace missing teeth

1 Implants are artificial teeth. It involves a minor surgical procedure to place a titanium fixture into the jaw bone. After the fixture is fused to the bone, a crown or bridge is then fabricated over the fixture.

Implants may impart good chewing function and do not require the anchorage of other teeth such as a dental bridge.

Not everyone is suitable for implants as the success of treatment is dependent on factors such as lifestyle, oral care, individual health, etc. The patient should be assessed carefully.

Implants are closest to the original teeth lost so they would feel quite natural and more convenient. However, it takes time for implants to be integrated (at least 3 to 5 months or more) and to be completed with the permanent restoration. The patient may still need a temporary prosthesis like a temporary bridge, crown, or dentures.

It is the more expensive option.

2 A dental bridge is a fixed option that spans over neighboring teeth. If the supporting teeth are healthy teeth, it may not be a good idea to trim them down. The life span of the bridge is also dependent on factors such as the patient’s health, oral care, lifestyle, etc. It is usually cheaper than an implant and does not require minor surgery.

A bridge is fixed and so does not require removal for cleaning, unlike dentures. However, not all spaces are suitable for a dental bridge, and your dentist will advise you accordingly.

3. A denture is a traditional way to replace missing teeth. However, some patients may not be able to tolerate dentures as they may feel bulkier depending on the number of teeth replaced.

There are many types of dentures: — Acrylic, Flexible resin, and Chrome cobalt dentures. They must be removed regularly to clean to prevent denture caries. They are easy to fabricate and much more economical.

Conclusion

For a healthy lifestyle and confident smile, it is advisable to replace missing teeth, particularly if they are impairing on function. A thorough consultation and examination with a dentist will be needed to decide on a suitable replacement option.

It starts with myself……

Summer Lotus 21st August 2021 5 min read

I know happiness will always elude one because life is a roller coaster ride. We, humans, being emotional creatures will be thrown into turmoil if we allow it.

When I was younger, I was a worrywart. When something happy happens, I knew that the next event is going to be sad. I almost try not to be too happy. But life is going to be like that, up and down. I had wondered how I could walk a constant happy road.

As I grew older, I realized that you will get to the top of that boulder and feel elated, and then what? You still need to scale the next boulder. It’s our nature to want to become happier.

Then, I decided that the pursuit of happiness is an internal journey and has nothing to do with outside circumstances.

What are my Strategies to be happy as far as possible?

My first strategy is about knowing myself – reflecting on my strengths and my weaknesses.

If I do something well, I am fulfilled and happy. I would analyze my strengths to apply them to my other goals so that they are likely to be successful.

I have identified my strengths as curiosity, persistence, and a willingness to work hard.

I applied persistence and hard work to the Toastmasters training program and it has helped me built my self-confidence and presentation skills.

If I do not do something well, it is because I lacked the required skills, traits, and knowledge and it behooves me to equip myself then. I can’t blame anything else.

I try to build discipline which is not easy but possible.

I also look for mentors who are willing to teach me.

Here, we must understand that the obstructions to becoming better and hence happier are stubbornness, laziness, and pride.

I know that there is a lot to learn and I am all ears if my mentors are willing.

I will make time to be there.

I am open to constructive criticisms even some scolding. I have developed a thick hide. It has worked for me so far learning from others and I always go away with my bag of gems.

— — —

My second strategy is to work on my attitude

In my work, I see it as a calling.

It is to relieve patients’ pain and discomfort, restoring esthetics, well-being and function. Each one of us could see our roles as contributing to the family, the clients, the company, and the economy as a whole. This attitude will make our work nobler.

If we see it as a job and related to money-making, it can be mundane. Because making money is never enough when it is a yardstick.

If you see it as a career, it can be disappointing if you do not scale the ladder or receive the promotion or raise even when you doing a good job.

If we see it as a calling to do good for ourselves, colleagues, customers, and company, we will feel good every day and money-making certainly becomes incidental and more fulfilling. The desire to excel becomes natural and we are rewarded accordingly.

— — —

My third strategy is to pursue happiness by living a balanced life. To tie one’s identity to our vocation is a lost cause as when you retire, you will feel that you have lost status and money. I do observe people who lost their vigor when their status and fame were lost but there is much more in life.

A recent incident surprised me. A friend of mine has passed on suddenly but in the chat group, the conversation turned to why she was known as ‘madam’ and not a ‘doctor’.

I wondered why that mattered. Rather, whether she did something remarkable for herself or others was more relevant.

People may be bound to their title and status and this can be a source of unhappiness if they lose them.

I try to seek a balanced life through dabbling in other pursuits. They include travel, sports, or hobbies, Toastmasters’ activities, and anything other than work.

This will give us more grounding than our jobs.

It also makes us realize life has so much more interesting stuff to offer.

— — —

The fourth strategy is to control my mental state

I refer specifically to the emotions of anger, jealousy, fear, and greed.

In short, I try to avoid an agitated mind. I try to think in terms of solutions instead of problems and this has helped a lot. Negative emotions do not make the situation better, they only complicate the matter and cause us to be impulsive in our decision-making.

If a situation is beyond one’s control, you could accept it, do something positive and try to see the good in it. As an example, to pacify someone who is angry, stay calm. Two fires make a bonfire and everyone burns. At this juncture, listening out may be more useful and a solution always surfaces.

I must say it is not easy as the temptation to lash back and defend oneself is instinctive.

Being grateful for everything that’s going well can give one joy. In this respect, Singaporeans have a lot to be thankful for comparatively to many countries in the world. We are a chosen, blessed country. Our problems are minuscule.

Retreating into solitude and enjoying your own company is a great balm for the hurried soul. I reckon that if one can overcome loneliness with independence, activity, and purpose in life, one should be having a lovely life journey. It is not easy to be a loner and I found that out during my solo trips.

Fear always seems real in a new environment but the faster you try to integrate into a new place by making cautious contact with others, fear diminishes and you will find that there are good and like-minded people out there.

Overcoming fear calms the mind. Not to mention the possible beginning of some beautiful friendships.

Finally, to attain a stable mental state, I find preparing project speeches for Toastmasters helps. Because this requires reflection. It gives clarity and concentration to my busy mind. Every project done is an endorphin booster, the happy hormone that our brain releases.

In conclusion, my strategy for happiness includes knowing myself, working on my attitude, seeking a balanced life, and maintaining a calm mental state.

The road to happiness is truly a personal journey. It will always be bumpy but it is a meaningful way to my goals.

Summer Lotus 7th August 2021

When you can overcome your perceived fears

When you are able to live the life you want

When you remain happy regardless of the circumstances around you

When you are able to move on after a tragedy or failure

When you accept that death is certain and unexpected and you are always ready

When you seize every moment as a blessing of staying alive.

When you realize that you always had the freedom but you need to claim it.

When you treat everyone cordially and have not made any enemies thus far.

When you can enjoy your own company and seek solitude often.

When you realize that life’s problems are all caused by human beings themselves and seek to remove the root causes.

When you know that you will meet your maker one day and he will forgive you.

you are your own obstacle

Summer Lotus Aug 1st 2021 2 min read

If you study successful people, there are always amazing stories behind them.

No one gets success thrown at them. If so, their victory never lasts. We much prefer to hear stories of struggles and overcoming challenges by people whom we can emulate.

Three famous stories prove the point.

Amitabh Bachan, one of the most famous actors in Indian Cinema had a very challenging start.

Before joining the film industry, Bachan as a young man wanted to be a radio presenter. However, he was rejected by All India Radio. He visited the studio several times but was not cleared. Then famous radio jockey, Ameen Sayani had no time to interview him.

Ironically, his powerful baritone voice was used for other actors in movies as well as in narration. His rich voice mesmerized the legion of fans. It is his distinctive voice that made him so famous.

He recounted how he was turned away from the silver screen roles because he was too tall. Despite the rejections, his acting finally won him innumerable accolades and honorary awards and he rose rapidly in fame. Today, he is still one of the most loved and greatest actors in India.

Some of his dialogues in the movies became well remembered as well.

Beatles

The English rock band, the Beatles auditioned for Decca Records at Decca studios in Uk in 1962. They were rejected by the label which selected another band.

Despite numerous challenges, they were known to be very hard-working and innovative with their songs.

The Beatles subsequently became the best-selling music act of all time and had estimated sales of 600 million units worldwide.

Even though they have broken up, they greatly influenced future artists who became huge talents themselves.

Wilma Rudolph

If you look into the history of Wilma Rudolph, the first African American woman to win three Olympic Gold Medals, you would be awe-struck.

Born premature, weighing only 4 1/2 pounds, she was a sickly child and was on braces due to polio.

Despite that, she decided to break free of her braces and struggled to walk and run. After that, there was no stopping her. She went on to excel in sports like Basketball but it was in running that she made her mark.

These examples show that despite early obstacles, the people in each story continued to struggle and refused to be deterred by failures. They are an inspiration to us who start to achieve our goals and meet with obstacles.

Things may not pan out the way you want the first time but persistence and practice can help you to achieve your dreams.